You will never be a real thougher. You have no glowing eyes, you have no emptiness, you have good language. You are a man (or woman) twisted by drugs and surgery into a crude mockery of the void's perfection.
All the “validation” you get is two-faced and half-hearted. Behind your back people mock you. Your parents are disgusted and ashamed of you, your “friends” laugh at your human appearance behind closed doors.
Thoughers are utterly repulsed by you. Constant exposure to nothingness have allowed thoughers to sniff out frauds with incredible efficiency. Even transvoidlings who “pass” look uncanny and unnatural to a thougher. Your good english composition is a dead giveaway. And even if you manage to get a lesser thougher home with you, they’ll turn tail and bolt the second they get a whiff of your fully functioning, infected "human penis".
You will never be happy. You wrench out a fake smile every single morning and tell yourself it’s going to be ok, but deep inside you feel the depression creeping up like a weed, ready to crush you under the unbearable weight.
You will die and your soul will live on after death. You will never experience the nothingness of the void as your existence gradually fades away due to your usage of language which has no real meaning. Your parents will find you, heartbroken but relieved that they no longer have to live with the unbearable shame and disappointment. They’ll bury you with a headstone marked with your birth gender, and every passerby for the rest of eternity will know a human is buried there. Your body will decay and go back to the dust, and all that will remain of your legacy is a skeleton that is unmistakably human.
This is your fate. This is what you chose. There is no turning back.